You'll see...

I can almost hear my mom's voice whenever something bad happens at home, "You'll see. It will get way worse. You'll remember my words". She said it when she was still fuming about a day-old argument with her son-in-law, my husband, but the phrase keeps hurting me even today.

I don't know if she was suggesting a divorce or just pointing out she doesn't approve of my choice of someone I want to rely on for the rest of my life, I don't know. Perhaps, she didn't really understand that I have been down that road. It was very bad and I know it can get way worse, yet I also see how it's getting better. Much much better. I don't blame her for not knowing though. We were never very close.

"You should change him. Gradually and carefully, as a woman, you should change him." I didn't even feel like arguing then. I've learned for myself that you don't enter a relationship in hopes that your partner will change. If they do, chances are it won't be the way you were aiming for. It's easier to learn to accept them and maybe for your relationship to change with both people bending their ways to get those gears together rather than putting it all onto one person.

My mom was like an angel to me for quite a while being the only person in my family who always stood up for my husband, who knew how important he was for me no matter how much emphasis I put on other things in my life. I guess she never really understood him and felt too disappointed when the part she misinterpreted came out. But oh well.

I start feeling better after writing this. Relationships are difficult as hell on their own and can get so much more complicated when your other loved ones get involved. What else is new?